


Misunderstandings

by RuArcher (Coriesocks)



Series: Shipmas 2018 [4]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: 12 days of shipmas, Christmas Fluff, Drinking, Fluff, Getting Together, Light Angst, M/M, Misunderstandings, Professor Teddy Lupin, Quidditch Player James Sirius Potter, Shipmas 2018
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-09
Updated: 2018-12-09
Packaged: 2019-09-14 13:52:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16914069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Coriesocks/pseuds/RuArcher
Summary: James needs some answers so surprises his best friend at his place of work.





	Misunderstandings

**Author's Note:**

> Shipmas fic 4!  
> For the prompt: I know you didn’t just stay at Hogwarts for the Cribbage’s Wizarding Crackers
> 
> now with added [art](https://coriesocks.tumblr.com/post/180948438743/a-quick-sketch-to-accompany-my-fourth-shipmas)!

James wandered through the large, familiar corridors, his footsteps echoing off the rough, stone walls. It’d only been a few months since he’d left school, but so much had happened since then—he’d been snapped up by the Tutshill Tornados; he’d travelled the world attending various training camps and skills workshops; he’d drunkenly slept with his best friend—that it felt more like six years than six months. He’d expected the place to look different now that he was older, more mature, a _proper_ adult with a career and everything, but it looked exactly the same. It even felt the same—so much so that he half expected one of his old teachers to stop him and ask him why he’d not handed in his homework.

He’d planned to make it to Hogwarts before dinner, but there’d been a delay with the Portkey due to some bureaucratic nonsense, so it was almost nine before he finally tumbled out of the Floo into the Headmistresses office. McGonagall had not looked too impressed when he’d appeared, close to four hours late with snow still clinging to his thick coat from having had to spend the best part of three hours wandering the streets of Tromsø. But then it had been at her insistence that he’d Floo’d into her office, rather than directly into Teddy’s quarters like he’d wanted.

She’d chased him out shortly after his cheery ‘Hi Minnie!’ without even offering him a biscuit, which he’d been quite put out about since he’d missed dinner.

In no time at all, he found himself outside Teddy’s door; a small brass nameplate proclaiming _Professor T Lupin_ letting him know that this was, without a doubt, the right place. He tried to reassure himself that Teddy would be happy to see him, but now that they were mere metres away from each other, separated only by a thick wooden door, all his confidence drained out of him. Teddy was his best friend, had _always_ been his best friend, even when Teddy only had only seen James as his annoying little godbrother, he’d always been James’ favourite person. But then, in the month between finishing his exams and heading off to training camp, something about their relationship had changed; touches lingered, looks became more heated, they barely spent any time apart. It may have all been in his head, but James had been certain there was _something_ there so, at his leaving party, he’d drunkenly confessed his feelings and then spent the night having the most spectacular sex of his life (from what he could remember). Teddy’s look of abject horror the next morning, when he’d obviously realised just who he’d woken up next to, was not what James had been expecting, so he’d done what anyone else would have done in that situation; he fled.

They’d exchanged a few letters in the six months since their _tryst_ , but they consisted of little more than fairly mundane day to day details. James had wanted to bring it up, but he’d had absolutely no idea how ( _hey Ted, remember when we screwed? What are your thoughts on that?_ ) so he’d always just…not said anything. Teddy hadn’t said anything either, though, and James didn’t know if this was a good or bad sign, so he had decided that he would find some way to speak to him at Christmas. He just wanted to clear the air, to either get things back to how they were, or see whether Teddy was interested in taking things further (which was by far the more preferable option). 

When he’d found from his dad that Teddy would be staying at Hogwarts for the holidays—something about responsibilities and Cribbage’s Crackers—he had made the rash decision to turn up unannounced. He knew he couldn’t let the weird atmosphere between them drag on for any longer.

He ran a hand through his hair to ensure it looked adequately ruffled, then, summoning up all his courage, knocked firmly on the door.

“Office hours are until six!” Teddy shouted through the door.

A little thrill ran through him at the sound of Teddy’s voice and he knocked again. There was a dull thud and some muffled swearing.

“Look, unless it’s literally a life or death charms emergency—” the door cracked open “—then you’ll have to— Jamie?” Teddy stared open-mouthed and his arm dropped limply to his side. 

James stifled a nervous giggle. “Hi, Ted.” He grinned and offered a rather feeble wave. It was his first look at Teddy since the morning he’d scarpered and he’d somehow managed to forget quite how attractive he was. His hair was a vivid turquoise, streaked with purple, and he was wearing a tight pair of jeans with an old band t-shirt that didn’t look very professor-like at all. His feet were bare and James was thrown back to the Summer when they’d spent days lounging in the garden at Grimmauld Place, wearing nothing but shorts, the grass dry and prickly between their toes.

Teddy clapped both his hands over his mouth, and then immediately dragged them into his hair, balling them into fists around clumps of turquoise. “Oh my God. Jamie! What are you doing here? Why didn’t you tell me you were coming? Is something wrong? Did something happen to Harry? Oh Merlin, please tell me you didn’t get fired.”

“Nice to see you too, Teddy,” James said with a smile. He wanted to reach in for a hug, but he wasn’t sure if it would be welcome. They’d always been fairly tactile with each other, but since the whole accidentally sleeping together thing, hugging seemed a little too intimate.

Teddy rolled his eyes and James’ heart skipped a beat. He loved that expression on Teddy’s face. Well, actually, he loved _every_ expression on Teddy’s face, but the exasperated-yet-fond eye roll was a particular favourite. “Shut up and get in here,” Teddy said warmly with a little shake of his head. “You have to tell me everything!”

He moved back to let James into his room, and James eagerly stepped inside, his eyes frantically trying to take in every little detail all at once. It was a small room, but it screamed Teddy and James was overcome with renewed affection for him. It basically looked like he’d just transferred the living room from his old flat in Canterbury. There were posters of various punk bands, only some of which James was familiar with, and photos of family and friends stuck all over the walls. In one corner, an acoustic guitar was propped up in a stand, alongside a pair of bongos and a couple of ukuleles. The furniture—bookshelves, a desk, a chintzy sofa, a coffee table—was basic, but it fitted the space well, and looked sturdy enough. What made James’ heart swell the most, though, was the books. There were _so many books_. They were wedged haphazardly onto the bookshelves and stacked on every available surface. It was just so Teddy, and James immediately loved it.

Teddy blustered past him just as James was wondering whether he should sit down somewhere. _Would Teddy kill him if he moved any of the books?_

“I’m so sorry about the mess—I wasn’t expecting company. Here, let me just—” he gathered up some of the books from the sofa and stacked them on the floor beside it. “There you go. Sit. Please. Can I get you anything? A drink? A biscuit? A drink and a biscuit?”

“No, I’m fine,” James lied, despite feeling like his stomach had already started to eat away at itself in hunger. He wouldn’t be distracted from what he came to do.

He perched on the edge of the sofa and studied the poster of a skinny man in tight leather trousers that was tacked above the fireplace rather than look around at Teddy as he settled on the opposite end. 

“Okay, well, come on then, out with it—last I heard you were stuck on an intensive training course in Norway until Christmas Eve, so what are you doing here, in my room, in Hogwarts, on the eighth of December?”

“Merlin, Teddy. Anyone would think you weren’t happy to see me,” James joked. At least, he hoped it sounded like he was joking. Part of him was screaming _Abort! Abort! Abort!_ and he was starting to panic that Teddy had a secret boyfriend hidden in his room and he’d blundered into the middle of their date night. Which he knew was stupid because there was absolutely no indication of there being anyone else in the room, but what if that was what Teddy _wanted_ him to think—

“Of course I’m happy to see you, you clown. I’m just surprised. You’d be surprised too if your best mate turned up out of the blue at bloody nine o’clock.”

James’ chest tightened at Teddy’s phrasing. _Best mate_. It was better than nothing, he supposed, but was that all that Teddy wanted? “So I didn’t, um, interrupt anything?” 

“Well, I was in the middle of marking a stack of exceptionally dry essays on the origins, uses, and variations of _Wingardium Leviosa_ , but you’re a welcome distraction.” Teddy grinned, and raked his fingers through his hair, righting the mess he’d made of it when he answered the door.

“Aw, Ted, I’m blushing,” James said lightly, and then rubbed his hands over his cheeks to try and cover-up the fact that his face was on fire.

Teddy laughed, the rich, warm sound wrapping itself around James like a hug. “Go on, then. To what do I owe the honour of your presence?” Teddy prompted.

“Right! It’s nothing very exciting, really. I just impressed the coaches with my exceptional skill and they decided to let me finish early for Christmas. Well, not just me. The whole team got to finish early—we’re much more cohesive than they were expecting at such an early stage—but anyway, then Dad told me you weren’t coming to Christmas so I thought I’d pop by to see you,” _and ask you if you still think about that night, and whether you’d be interested in doing it again sometime—repeatedly—and if you’re not coming to the Burrow because you’re avoiding me,_ he added in his head.

Teddy’s face froze just long enough for James to panic that he’d accidentally said some of his thoughts out loud, but then he relaxed into an easy smile. “Wow, that’s brilliant, Jamie. Really, really great. I bet your parents are thrilled to have you back early.”

“Yeah, I expect they will be…but you’re actually the first person I’ve told, so, um, don’t let on—I want to surprise them all later, maybe just turn up at Gran’s on Sunday with a bow on my head.” He snorted out a laugh imagining the look on his Gran’s face if he followed through with that.

Teddy joined in with his laughter, but it sounded empty this time. He looked like he’d swallowed something unpleasant. “I wish I could be there to see it,” he sighed. 

“You could always come to. Surely old Minnie will let you off the castle grounds to visit your family for a Sunday lunch since you’re staying here all Christmas.”

“I’d love to, but I have so much marking to do and lesson plans to write.” He gestured vaguely at the desk behind him, covered with rolls of parchment. “I can’t really spare the time.” 

James could tell Teddy wasn’t being completely honest with him. He already felt like Teddy was purposefully avoiding Christmas at the Burrow, but now he was avoiding Sunday lunch because of him? 

“So, um, how long are you staying for? Here, I mean. At Hogwarts,” Teddy asked before James could descend too far into despair. “Do you have to dash off, or do you have time for a drink?”

“Oh, I’ve not got any plans actually, so I’m yours for as long as you want me.” The casual flirtation slipped easily from his lips. It was like muscle memory—everything became an innuendo in Teddy’s presence—but then he saw Teddy blanch and reality came along and kicked him in the gut. 

Teddy stood up stiffly, clearing his throat. “I’ve got, um. Let me just get— I’ll be right back,” he spluttered, then turned on his heel and disappeared through the door and out into the hall.

James stared in disbelief as the door swung shut behind him. He wanted to kick himself. Why did he have to go and blurt ‘I’m yours’? What sort of idiotic person would say something like that in their situation? At least it was now very clear that Teddy didn’t like him in the same way; that they would never be more than friends. Maybe not even that after James’ blunder. He groaned loudly and buried his face in his hands, calling himself every derogatory name he could think of as Teddy’s unimpressed face and hurried exit replayed in his mind.

Just as James was considering whether or not to leave with his tail between his legs, Teddy returned as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened. He had a six pack of beers under one arm and a plate of sandwiches in the other hand. “Sorry about that. I thought I’d go rustle up some food and drink from the kitchens.”

James frowned. It didn’t sound like an unreasonable excuse. Had he imagined Teddy’s reaction? “Wait, can’t you just summon a house-elf? Surely that has to be one of the perks of being a teacher.”

“Er, yeah, I suppose, but I don’t like to call on them too much, not when I’m perfectly capable. Elf rights and all that.” He chuckled, his eyes darting to the side as he avoided James’ gaze and placed the food and drink on the coffee table.

It was now or never, James decided. He was going to pick and pick at this scab until Teddy told him exactly where they stood so there could be no misunderstanding or ambiguity. “Is everything okay? You’re acting really….I dunno. Weird. Is it…” he paused, steeling himself. He knew Teddy would never be intentionally cruel to him, but he could only see this ending one way and he knew it would hurt him deeply. “Is it because of what happened…that night before I left for training camp?” He stared at his sweaty hands, clasped tightly in his lap.

“What do you mean? I’m not being strange! I’m being perfectly ordinary. I’m just…just a little surprised to see you, is all,” Teddy replied, his voice artificially light and breezy.

James sighed. Teddy wouldn’t even give him a straight answer when asked directly. He took his focus off his hands and glanced around the room, his eyes catching on a photo of him and Teddy playfully shoving each other instead of smiling for the camera. James longed for that closeness again. He wished he could turn back time and not drunkenly fuck Teddy. “Do you want me to go?” he asked quietly, feeling certain Teddy would say yes.

“No!” Teddy cried, and James snapped his head up to stare at him. “Please, stay, have a drink! Tell me all about your exciting adventures as a pro-Quidditch player.” Teddy handed him a beer and put the sandwiches down on the table in front of them. He didn’t look that comfortable, but he hadn’t kicked James out so that had to be a good thing…right?

As James told Teddy all about his job, things he’d probably already covered in the few letters they’d exchanged, he started to relax. Teddy looked more at ease too, perhaps because Quidditch was neutral ground and there was less risk of James asking awkward questions about things Teddy wanted to forget. Whatever it was, James wasn’t going to complain because talking to and hanging out with Teddy was his favourite thing and he didn’t want to fuck it up again. 

———

“I can’t believe you chose crackers over your own family,” James blurted once the beer had loosened his tongue enough to allow him to bring up something that had been plaguing him since he’d last spoken to his dad.

“What?”

“Oh, it’s just Dad, when he told me you weren’t coming to the Burrow for Christmas, said that you were staying for the Cribbage’s Wizarding Crackers since Granny Molly always makes her own and you don’t like them as much.”

“Your entire family think I’m abandoning them at Christmas because of my cracker preferences?” Teddy looked horrified. “Oh, Merlin. Molly’s never going to let me hear the end of it.”

James laughed heartily at Teddy’s reaction and even had to wipe away a few tears. But then the beer urged him to continue prodding. “So…what’s the real reason?”

Teddy glanced away and started picking at the edge of the beer label on his bottle. “I told you—Minerva asked me to stay.”

“No, she didn’t.”

“What?”

“When I spoke to her before coming here, she said ‘Maybe you can talk some sense into him. Your father seems to be under the impression that I’m keeping him here against his will.’ So what is it? Is it me? Did I fuck things up so badly between us that you can’t even spend Christmas with your family?” James’ chest was heaving, and at some point in his mini-rant, he’d stood up and balled his fists at his side.

Teddy stared at him for a few moments, several emotions warring for dominance on his face, but then he sighed deeply and dropped his head into his hands. “You didn’t fuck things up. I did.”

“What do you mean?”

Teddy looked up at him, his eyes—a bright turquoise like his hair—shimmered. “I never should have let things get as far as they did. We were drunk, but I shouldn’t have taken advantage of you like that.”

James curled his lip. “What the fuck, Teddy,” he yelled. “How have you ever taken advantage of me? I wanted it. I’ve wanted it for years. If anything, _I_ took advantage of _you_!”

Teddy gaped. “But…you ran away. The next morning. You didn’t even stay for breakfast!” he shouted, standing up to face James. 

“That’s because I thought you didn’t want me there! You looked at me like I pissed in your bed! I thought—” he cut himself off and paced away from Teddy, dragging a hand through his hair. “I didn’t want to hear you tell me how much you regretted it,” he added quietly. “I thought that if I ran, I wouldn’t have to listen to you explain that you only like me as a friend.”

“That ‘look’ was me with a killer hangover trying to work out what happened. I didn’t regret it, Jamie, not in the way you think, anyway. The only thing I regret is being so off my tits that I can barely remember anything! And, well, now I regret looking at you like you ‘pissed the bed’.” 

James stopped pacing; he couldn’t quite believe what he was hearing. 

“So, um, have you really…you know, _wanted_ …for years?” Teddy asked, his smile shy and hopeful.

“Yeah. You mean the world to me, Teddy.” He drew closer and reached out, taking Teddy’s hand.

“Wow. That’s…wow.” A grin slowly spread across Teddy’s face. “I…I suppose I should let Minerva know she’ll be down one member of staff over Christmas.”

“You’ll come to the Burrow, then?”

“Yeah. I’ll be there.” 

“Yes! I knew you didn’t just want to stay at Hogwarts for the Cribbage’s Wizarding Crackers!”

James couldn’t hold back any longer. He threw himself at Teddy, leaping up and wrapping himself around him like a koala. Teddy caught him with ease, hooking his arms beneath James’ arse, and when their lips met, James finally felt complete.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Find me on tumblr @ [coriesocks](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/coriesocks)


End file.
